Pauley Perrette as Abby on NCIS. (Photo: Bill Inoshita, CBS)
Last. Three. Episodes. How did this happen? How did we get here so all of a sudden like? Only three more weeks with Very Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo? Say it ain’t so!
Alas. It is so. Sigh. As much as I would like to keep pretending that we can just skip weeks with new episodes and it might never happen, there will be no more skipping. We have tonight, next Tuesday, and then dun dun dun … May 17 will arrive. And Tony will depart.
I guess we should find out how they’re going to do that. And introduce two new team players while they are at it. Pass me that fruity umbrella drink, will you? I used to only have those on the later-in-the-evening shows I recapped. But I think we deserve it, don’t you?
OK, then, on we go! As you may recall, we were left cliffhanging at the end of our last episode. What with that treasonous British MI-6 double agent escaping prison, and taking Vance hostage, killing the former NCIS director in his own home … all as he tries to avenge the death of his wife and retaliate against the agents who put him in prison. (If you missed the last ep, check out my full recap here.)
We open with a young teen saying goodbye to his military dad as he heads back overseas on another tour of duty. Dad puts teen son in charge of taking care of his mom and infant sister. “Keep them safe,” he tells his young son, who nods, agrees, but is tearful as his father hugs him goodbye. Segue to current day and our Teen Son on the floor of a closet, presumably in his home, looking terrified, holding a gun in shaking hands. The closet door is opened, and two police officers train their guns on him, telling him to lower his own. Terrified Teen Son does, dropping the gun to the carpet, hands still shaking, saying only, “I had to do it.”
Cue awesome theme song and opening credits!
Bishop, McGee, Ducky and Abs are at the diner, chowing down, discussing the former director’s funeral, which they all apparently just attended. To the surprise of no one, Abby tells them when she dies, she wants them to throw an all-night rager, celebrating her life, not mourning her death. Then she asks about Tony, and I try not to read anything into this talk about funerals and how folks want to be remembered before oh-so-not-red-flaggingly asking after our soon-to-depart special agent. We learn that DiNozzo is in England, tracking down intel on our MI-6 Spy Guy. Bishop comments that after killing the former director, he’s being sought by every country in the world. “Only so many places he can hide.”
Gibbs enters the diner, informs them of the home invasion, and after swigging down a mug of coffee to appease Abby’s “breakfast is the most important meal of the day” admonition, off they all go. At the house, we learn that Teen Son was home alone and thwarted a knife-wielding home invader by shooting him in the leg with his Marine dad’s revolver. Thief took off, leaving a blood trail behind, along with 14-year-old Teen Son trembling in the closet. Outside, McGee informs Teen’s Mom that they’ll need to take a separate statement directly from TS, who assures her he can handle it. He wants to pick up his baby sister from day care first. Mom demurs, saying how far away it is, but McGee sees TS’s need to have his family all accounted for and assures him they’ll pick her up on the way in.
Shifting to Vance’s office, Gibbs is there giving him a summation of the home invasion, then in comes Fornell. Gibbs is all, “Why is he here?” and the new smartphone owner is all, “Hello to you, too. Why didn’t you respond to my Snapchat?” HA! Vance wants to update them on Tony’s mission, and Fornell feels sorry for the MI-6 agent Tony is working with, having to listen to his “endearing Bond impressions.” Followed by “So, where is the spy who loved me?” Love Fornell! Make him a regular, Show! We learn Tony has left London and is now on the way to Russia, following a lead on Spy Guy.
Vance informs Gibbs and Fornell that the sheet Spy Guy stole with the names of the mission team he holds responsible for killing his wife included only NCIS agents. There were MI-6 agents on that team, too, but their names were redacted by the then-head of MI-6, who has since retired and gone to ground. Tony left intel on her whereabouts with his MI-6 contact in London before he left. Gibbs thinks he and Fornell are being sent to London to follow up, but no dice. Gibbs has to stay and finish up the home invasion case. So Fornell — making Sherlock wisecracks — finds out he’s playing Dr. Watson to … Vance. HA! Intrigue and bro-trip humor. My favorite combination. Fornell doesn’t look nearly as amused as I do. Fade to black and white.
We return to the Bull Pen of Orangey Goodness and McGee on the phone with Tony, who is offering him a mail-order Russian bride. Such a kidder. (Can I comment that with only three eps to go until he leaves the show, that it might be kind of nice to have Tony actually present on screen as much as possible between now and then? Or, at least with tonight’s ep so far anyway, at all on our screen?) We learn that Tony is tracking Spy Guy’s father-in-law, which currently involves a Russian bath house.
Gibbs enters and we go to the Screen of All Knowing for a home invasion case update. Home Invader is an ex-con, violent offender, suspect in a number of drug-related murders in the area. No reports of any gunshot victims matching his ID checking into area hospitals. Gibbs mentions that robbery isn’t part of his MO, so could he have another reason for entering Teen Son’s home?
We learn that Teen’s Mom was a former ADA in California with an impressive conviction rate, and Marine dad worked special ops, so perhaps it was something from their past that provoked the intruder? Mom says no, she’s just a receptionist now. They live in West Virginia now and she would have to take the bar there to practice law. Her sister’s illness drained their savings to cover her medical expenses, so Mom works during the day and studies for the bar exam at night. Teen Son wants to know if they ID’d the intruder. McGee shows them the photo, and Mom asks Teen if that was the guy. He looks at her, says yes, then asks if the guy will come back, if they’re being targeted. McGee tells him he doesn’t know. Mom and Teen say they’ve never seen Intruder before. Teen asks if his dad has heard what happened. Communication is down on his base, but they will try to find out when he’s coming back. His six-month tour was up a month ago, but he was detained due to the security breach with the communication system snafu.
Joe Spano as Fornell and Rocky Carroll as Vance on NCIS. (Photo: Bill Inoshita, CBS)
We shift to a rainy London street that almost-but-not-quite doesn’t look green-screened, lots of double-decker red buses rolling by in the background to help us “imagine.” Fornell is hungry, he hasn’t eaten since D.C. He comments that he didn’t get fed like Vance did in first class. Vance smiles, mentions credit card points. A man in a trench coat approaches, offers a line that is clearly code. Fornell wants to know if he’s MI-6. The man looks chagrined, repeats the line. Vance responds with one of his own, and the man hands over a small case, then leaves. Fornell wants to know what that was all about, and Vance explains that Tony left instructions behind for the coded exchange. (Also? Still no Tony in sight. Sigh.) Inside the case are their firearms, and a copy of Former MI-6’s initial form when she first applied to MI-6, with an “in case of emergency” contact highlighted. Vance comments that she has no family, so apparently this is a lead they didn’t have before. Tally-ho!
Across the pond in Abby Lab, she explains to Gibbs how she wants to honor him as a builder of things and catcher of bad guys, prompting Gibbs to ask what she’s talking about. She’s decided after hearing all the kind things folks said about the former director at his funeral, that they should start saying those nice things now, while they’re still alive. Hashtag Living Rocks. She “celebrates” McGee and repeats her hashtag, prompting Gibbs to say, “Hashtag, get to the point.” Abby marvels over his first use of the word hashtag. Heh. We then proceed to the gun Teen used to shoot Intruder. All of the ballistics line up, but the problem is that the safe where Marine Dad keeps the gun is programmed to list the date and time whenever the safe is opened. Turns out, the last time it was opened was two days before the break-in.
Gibbs heads out, presumably to go talk to Teen, but McGee stops him and requests that he be the one to talk to him. He explains that although Gibbs’ father was also military, he had retired before Gibbs was born, and with his own family, Gibbs was the one deployed. A very different thing from being left on the homefront (cue: Title Meaning) while dad is away fighting a war. Gibbs sees his point, knows McGee speaks from personal experience and agrees to let McGee be the one to handle the follow-up.
Benjamin Stockham as Henry and Sean Murray as McGee on NCIS. (Photo: Bill Inoshita, CBS)
At the diner counter, Teen and McGee eat and talk, with McGee sharing anecdotes about his own father deploying. He shares how challenging the tumult of emotions are when you keep them locked inside. Teen sighs, then says he knows why McGee brought him there, and how he thought he could handle it on his own. He goes on to say that he was out after dark, walking home, and saw one guy stab another guy in an alley. He went to the guy on the ground after the attacker left, only he was dead. Teen heard the other guy coming back and took off for home. He got his dad’s gun out and held on to it. He asks McGee if Intruder is going to come back and kill him. Fade to black and white.
Back in the Bull Pen, McGee fills in the details for Gibbs, adding that they don’t know how Intruder figured out where Teen lived, he didn’t think he was followed home. And that there are two unidentified stabbing victims in the morgue that match the description, but neither was found in an alley, though the body could have been moved post-mortem. Gibbs heads out and is flagged down by Bishop, who is incensed that Mom is prevented from practicing law simply because she crossed state lines, and how military families who are uprooted constantly due to their spouses being reassigned to new bases should get special dispensation. Many states reciprocate for that reason, but West Virginia does not. Gibbs tells her to focus on the case, but Bishop is on a roll. She wants to reach out to Joining Forces, an organization that helps military families contend with the various special circumstances that arise due to the unique situation serving their country can put them in, but Gibbs tells her he’s already contacted them. She thanks him, and he tells her if she wants to thank him, find Intruder!
We shift to Gibbs and Mom strolling about the city of my birth, D.C., as he explains to her what was really going on with Teen Son. He wants to put their family in protective custody and tells her that they need Teen’s help to solve the case. She is resistant, but understands that without his help, the threat to them all simply continues. We move to the Harpers Ferry PD. The same detective worked both stabbing cases and comes in to talk to Gibbs, McGee and Teen. Detective, McGee and Teen are seated, and Gibbs stands off to the side, observing. You can tell he’s thinking something isn’t right, but with what part, we don’t know. Teen is shown mug shots of both stabbing victims, but is unsure if the man he saw in the alley is either of them. McGee warns him that the crime scene photos are difficult to look at, but Teen says he wants to see them. Gibbs watches him as he is shown one photo of each man, stabbed and dead. He shakes his head, says they aren’t the guy he saw.
Back in London, Fornell and Vance enter a pub (fill in your own “Two agents walk into a bar” punch line here). A dog runs out as they enter, prompting Vance to mutter about health codes, and Fornell to shoot back, “Traditional pub with charming locals. Doesn’t get any better than this.” It’s Special Agents Oscar and Felix Do London. Heh. Turns out the man they are there to see is the pub owner, and Former MI-6 Director’s uncle. After a little to-do involving flashing badges and a behind-the-bar shotgun, they explain their interest is in keeping her safe and why she’s in danger, and he grudgingly agrees to take them to her.
Emily Wickersham as Bishop on NCIS. (Photo: Bill Inoshita, CBS)
Bishop and Abby are collecting evidence in the alley as Abby continues her #LivingRocks! movement by celebrating Bishop, hoping that the whole thing might catch on, go global. Some global social media positivity would surely be welcome at the moment, but I’m not sure she should get her hopes up. As it happens, they don’t find a single trace of blood where Teen says he saw the man stabbed. Shifting to Teen’s house, McGee asks him if he’s OK. Teen confesses he has this recurring dream about his dad telling him goodbye, and McGee says he understands the fear that it might be the last time he would see his dad alive. Teen swears he is telling the truth about what he saw and asks if McGee believes him. A mug shot comes up on the television screen of a drug dealer whose body was just pulled from the Anacostia River. Teen gulps, tells McGee that that is the guy he saw getting stabbed. Fade to black and white.
Can I just mention again, that, with only three eps left, how deeply disappointed I am that Tony is completely AWOL from this (or any remaining) episode. I mean, he doesn’t need to be central, but wtfreak, Show? Sure, this episode is entertaining and both story lines interesting, but we’ll have plenty of time to adapt to Tony being gone after he is, you know, actually gone. You’ve had most of this season to plan his exit, so if this is your idea of what a satisfying conclusion to a 13-season run looks like, well, so far, and with very little time left to spin that story, you’re batting zero.
Ahem. Where was I? OK, so back at the Bull Pen, Bishop and McGee tell Gibbs that the medical examiner who examined Dead Drug Dealer’s body said the results corroborate with Teen’s story about what he saw. The HFPD detective enters then with a folder on Dead Drug Dealer’s “greatest hits,” saying how the world is better off with him dead. He says it wouldn’t surprise him if Intruder killed DDD, as they were both working the same territory. Gibbs wants Ducky to do his own once-over, and HFPDD says the body is already on the way.
Shift to the soundstage — er, bucolic English countryside, replete with baa-ing sheep positioned Just So on green hills dappled with sunlight as an old lorry carrying Vance, Fornell and Uncle Shotgun bounces over deeply rutted roads before finally arriving at the equally bucolic cottage of the Former MI-6 Director, aka Shotgun’s niece. Said niece bursts out of her little cottage toting her own shotgun. “Striking family resemblance,” says Fornell. Heh. She’s all, “Why aren’t you tracking Spy Guy down instead of bothering me?” until she hears about Former NCIS Director being all dead, then it’s, “OK, come on in.” (She sounds more Aussie than Brit, but maybe that’s just me. Like the rest of the “British setting,” we’ll just go with it. Apparently, shooting exteriors in Washington, D.C., took up too much of the budget to send the crew to Actual England.)
Back at Gibbs’ place, aka Safe House for Mom, Teen and baby sis, Gibbs comes home to Mom explaining that Teen is upstairs with the baby, annoyed at being watched over so closely by Mom. She surprises Gibbs by revealing that she got Intruder’s criminal file (favor from a friend at the courthouse), and given she’s prosecuted guys like him, she’s more than a little alarmed. As she’s talking about how her family isn’t safe anywhere, we see Teen listening in around the corner.
Emily Wickersham as Bishop, David McCallum as Ducky and Pauley Perrette as Abby on NCIS. (Photo: Bill Inoshita, CBS)
Moving to Ducky’s Digs, Bishop enters and we confirm that Dead Drug Dealer was dead when the body was dumped in the river and he died from a stab wound. There was a fight prior to the stabbing, and the stab marks carry a serrated, jagged pattern. (I’ll take Ducky’s word for it. Even fake TV dead guys on slabs skeeve me out.) Abby pops up via screen to celebrate Ducky with her #LivingRocks tribute. Ducky is touched, then asks about the knife wound. Abby said it was made with a five-inch military knife, and that the DNA under DDD’s fingernails was a match to Intruder. So, all the info matches Teen’s story, except that part where there wasn’t a single drop of blood in the alley. McGee pops in to the screen and says they got a BOLO hit on Intruder’s RV.
Sean Murray as McGee and Benjamin Stockham as Henry. (Photo: Bill Inoshita, CBS)
Shift to Gibbs, McGee and Bishop advancing on said RV, guns drawn. Inside they find the military knife … and dead Intruder. Teen might not be safe yet, not if the guy who killed Intruder also knows about Teen. Gibbs takes a call from the guys watching his house that they can’t find Teen. He orders them to stay at the house, orders Bishop to stay with the RV for processing, and McGee says he thinks he knows where Teen is headed and goes with Gibbs. It’s dark by the time McGee gets to the alley where Teen saw DDD stabbed to death. Teen is there, baseball bat in hand. McGee tells Teen that Intruder can’t come after him, that he’s dead, and takes him back to Gibbs’ house. Teen guesses that it’s not over, that whoever killed Intruder could still be after him, that he has to keep his family safe. McGee says it’s his job to keep Teen safe, so why not work together to do both of those things? Teen agrees.
Across the pond, Vance and Fornell are chatting with Niece, and she’s explaining that there was more to the mission than they know. They lured Spy Guy’s Russian wife out of the embassy in Istanbul using one of SG’s own phones, only she was immediately taken out by a sniper. Vance and Niece agree they assumed the Russians took her out rather than have her captured where she could spill secrets. Given their target was neutralized, the mission was deemed a success, case closed. But Niece knew that the only way the sniper hit could have happened was if one of her own had leaked the mission details. So she conducted an off-the-books investigation. All her operatives were cleared, so it had to come from the NCIS side of the mission team. She related the info to Former NCIS Director, who buried it. Suddenly, the sheep outside are restless, and then two red laser sights pierce the window. Right before a bunch of bullets do the same. Fornell and Vance dive to the floor, Niece and Uncle take up positions in the corner. They all dodge the bullets, return some of their own, then the sound of squealing wheels indicates the threat has left the village. Fade to black and white.
Vance in England is talking to Gibbs in D.C., saying they don’t know for sure who was firing the bullets, but the assumption is Spy Guy is back in the U.K. Gibbs wants to know who knew he and Fornell were in England. A few NCIS, FBI and MI-6 folks all knew, so their list of who to trust just got shorter. They have a mole somewhere. Gibbs says he’ll pull Tony back from Moscow and Vance has to keep Niece safe as she’s definitely a target, so they’re all on the next flight back to the States. MI-6 will follow up on leads in the U.K.
In D.C., Gibbs is meeting with a guy to better understand the obstacles regarding pushing the legislation to make all state bars reciprocal for lawyers who are part of military families. He says Joining Forces is making headway and he’ll push Mom’s case up his chain of command to help get her instated in West Virginia so she can practice law again.
Shifting to Abby Lab, she confirmed that the knife was the murder weapon but wonders why Intruder would leave that so dirty when the crime scene was scrubbed so clean. She did confirm that the scene had been scrubbed with a professional-grade crime scene cleaner. Perhaps it was the guy who killed Intruder covering tracks? Bishop takes a moment to celebrate Abby with her own #LivingRocks tribute. Then McGee rushes in and tells them that the traffic cameras facing the crime scene were accessed, and likely how Teen was tracked from the scene back to his house. But, though Intruder did the dirty work, tracking Teen down, the cameras were accessed by someone else. They were accessed by HFPD.
Enter Gibbs and Bishop to the HFPD where they confront Detective who says he heard about Intruder being dead and all. Bishop agrees, saying they found out a dirty cop who was in with the local drug dealers did it. Detective looks a little upset at having his department smeared, but Gibbs is already past that. He walks over to the other cop who was on the scene at Teen’s house after the shooting. Turns out she’s the one on the take and they have the murder weapon used on Intruder, found at her house, to prove it. Who knew? She gets the perp walk out, past shocked Detective, as Gibbs takes her gun.
First Lady Michelle Obama in a scene on NCIS with Mark Harmon and Reiko Aylesworth. (Official White House photo by Lawrence Jackson, via CBS)
Gibbs takes a call, looks surprised, says, “Yeah, we’ll be there,” and hangs up. Pan to an aerial view of the White House. (A shame the special FLOTUS “guest appearance” wasn’t kept under wraps. Would have been more fun.) We see Mom talking to the First Lady (real, not fictional) saying she felt better hearing all the stories from other families and is told that’s why they have the round tables, to keep things connected between the various branches as the Joining Forces organization works to help. A nicely done PSA masquerading as a scene follows, and hey, regardless of politics and parties, as the daughter of a veteran, if it helps military families, I’m all for it. (No political e-mails please. I get it. But it’s just a television show. Let it go. Moving on …)
Back at Teen’s house, McGee is finishing up sanding over the bullet hole in the living room wall. Teen asks if his dad taught him how to do that. McGee nods, then in rushes Mom and Baby Sis. She tells Teen the situation at Dad’s base is over. Teen is all, “So we can talk to him?” They sure can, in person. Dad comes in, family hugs it out as Gibbs watches on. And fictional or real, I don’t care how many times I see it, reunited military families always make me tear up. Thank you for your very real service, the deployed and the families back at home.
But don’t think this lets you off the No-DiNozzo hook, Show!! I’m still pouting about that misfire.
We shift to Fornell on the phone with his daughter as he and Niece enter Gibbs’ place. Casual conversation ensues as Fornell goes to the fridge for a drink (and I wait for the red beam to come through the window and drop Niece in her tracks). Then Fornell notices the footprint on the floor, the basement door cracked open. He keeps talking casually enough to Niece, but is already plotting his next move. He enters the living room, talking about sheep as early-detection devices and Niece quickly picks up on the thread. Just as Fornell goes for his gun, the front door busts open and he takes several to the chest. Niece takes at least one to the leg. She goes down and is staring up at the gunman. We see a gloved hand, the barrel of the gun pointed at her head. And then it fires. Gunman leaves, and Fornell, who flipped over and between the coffee table and the couch, moves slightly, but his ringing phone goes unanswered as he reaches toward it … then goes limp.
To Be Continued.
Really? Because I don’t know if I want to continue. NOT Fornell. COME ON! You already killed off his wife. He’s one of the few who can make me forget we’re losing Tony. Have some compassion, man.
Well … shoot. No pun intended. How do I segue from that to giving away cool free stuff to people who were once happy NCIS viewers. Like me. HAPPY. At least we have to wait only a week to find out wtfreak instead of all summer. But if showrunner Gary Glasberg said the Tony exit story was going to be an emotional roller coaster, well, we’re already on that E Ticket ride, so I shudder to think where it’s headed.
Maybe a little distraction is in order. I am both overwhelmed and touched by your kind words, about this column, about my books, about the show, and your willingness to try new things. Namely a full set of the first five books in my Blueberry Cove series, which I put up for grabs last we met, lo those two weeks ago, when all we worried about was how Tony was going to leave the show. (See, I’m celebrating the fact that, Starfish Moon, the last one in the series, just came out last week. Thank goodness it wasn’t this week!) I’m happy to announce the winner is Kathleen Knutson! Kathleen simply drop an e-mail to me at donna@donnakauffman.com with an address, and your prize pack will go out in the mail to you!
And yes, there is a new giveaway, because goodness knows we need something to look forward to right now! How about the audiobook version of my brand spankin’ new book? (Did I mention Starfish Moon came out last week? I did?) Narrated by the lovely and wonderfully talented Amanda Ronconi, who did the last three of this series (and, might I add, nailed it!). I have TWO Audible copies up for grabs! Want in? Simply drop me an e-mail to donna@donnakauffman.com with “I want to listen to Starfish Moon! Pick me!” in the subject line. That’s it! If you want to include your politics-free comments about the episode (and presumably your shared outrage about the cliff we are hanging from this week), then I’d love to hear about it! If you’d like to get in on all the between-the-recaps frivolity along with additional weekly giveaways, drop by my Facebook page. We’d love to have you. Want to know more about my “day job”? Check out www.donnakauffman.com and tiptoe through the titles. (But be gentle, I’m ticklish!)